Days 3 and 4(:

Sorry, i'm off once again. But here we go(:

Day 3!
My saturday was good. I spent most of the day relaxing which was nice. I really didn't do much but sit and watch t.v., but hey, that's how i like to start my summer! I did go to my friend Elena's party last night, and it was so much fun. It didn't start til 8 which is part of why i couldn't write a blog post earlier in the day. There 10 girls total, plus Elena's two sisters and one of their friends. So it was a house FULL of girls.  Her parents were amazing for doing that, i know my mom never would have gone for it. We camped out and overall it was just a ton of summer fun. We spent some time (not much) talking about how we are all seniors and it was kinda cool. It's like yeah we finally made it and we are gonna plan the most badass (in a fun way) year ever. To me it was also a little bitter sweet. Like yeah we're seniors, and before we know it we won't be. I'm just kind of sad that the year will end fast (even though it hasn't even started). I worry a lot, i know. The positive event though was definitely Elena's house. It was so so so so much fun, and Elena's youngest sister was adorable!

Day 4!
Today has gone a lot more....mild. I came home from Elena's house and i'm not gonna lie i was pretty grumpy. I ended up napping for a couple hours which i didn't mind considering i was exhausted. I don't know why but i've been having trouble sleeping. Anyways the rest of my day, as it's now 5:30, has been spent watching the nanny and munching on food i shouldn't eat. I just love junk food way too much! Right now mint oreos and paydays are my favorite. This is probably going to be how the rest of today goes. I'll be honest, i don't know if i truly feel anything positive has happened today. I guess sleeping is what i'll go with because it's better than being half dead, but really today hasn't been that wonderful. My mom saw a bruise on my shoulder (for those who don't know i bruise myself. Technically i'm badly addicted to self harm. I just don't like admitting it..and at this point i have no desire to stop it...) and she said if she see's more and i can't explain them then we're going to the doctor. My mom right now is under the impression that i'm being beaten up. It's her own idea. However i don't have the heart now (and i never will) to tell her that i'm doing this to myself. So while i'm writing this and doing everything else, i'm desperately trying to find an excuse for the bruises, or something else i can do instead of bruising. I need something to keep me sane to keep my mom happy. For the record, my doctor does know about the bruises and the real reason, and he sent me to a therapist for it. He also promised he wouldn't tell my mom (unless he had to) if i would go. So there is that situation. And that ladies and gentlemen, is why i'm not feeling too positive today.